I think TOO MUCH

I know all that you won't believe me, because it is unimaginable for you that someone thinks like that. Yet it is the pure truth.

I feel very honored and blessed that you feel all that you have written to me and that I convey and give you all of this. That you feel so safe and secure with me, so that you can always tell me the truth at any time, because you know I understand you and do not judge you. And I hope that will always be the case.

But to be honest, I'm scared of all of this. I am afraid of being hurt and disappointed. Not because of you and everything around, but because I know I had to take a lot in life if I thought that life meant well with me. That's why I've become more careful, which is not always good.

I am afraid that I will not be able to live up to all of this. That all that I am for you is just an illusion in your head and as soon as we see each other for real, that you are disappointed. I know you say I can never let you down However, I would like to wait for our first meeting and see if the spark leaps over there and you still feel exactly as you have now written. Because the fear always remains.

Luck was never on my side, and certainly not when it came to love. Which is a shame. I wish it so much and because of that I always question too much ...